I reckon I know what flatters my body shape, and what will suit me. The above dress fits neither category - yet I find myself inexplicably drawn to bidding for it on ebay. Because sometimes, just sometimes, it pays to follow your instinctive response.
My instinctive response to this frock is "ooh, fabulous", and I'll tell you why:
- That neckline is a direct transplant from the Roland Mouret "Galaxy Dress", created in 2006 and a honest-to-goodness classic ever since (although whether Mouret can be said to have designed something so transparently lifted from 1940s daywear is debateable - but here's a photo anyway. Don't you love how awful Vicky Beckham looks in this? That's because it's designed to accentuate an hourglass physique, for which one does need some actual body fat.)
- It's another candidate for my glam work wardrobe - not too low cut or clingy. And all one piece - so easy to throw on.
- The full skirt suggests a rockabilly vibe - fun, retro, stylish, and slightly subversive (imagine an old school tattoo emerging from the neckline or shoulder? Not that I have one, but that would look unspeakably cool) - it's a good candidate for a wide belt in a statement colour or pattern, too.
- It's by Monsoon - which is a label of reliable quality, but more to the point Monsoon frocks hold their value insanely strongly on ebay. The resale for a second hand Monsoon frock often reaches 75% of its retail price, especially in the larger sizes.
- Look at that strong wide horizontal neckline. How wide will my boobs look? Terrifying thought...
- It's pale - which doesn't suit my skintone - and beigish grey. Where's the drama? the passion?
- No sleeves. Why does nothing have sleeves anymore?
- Dangerous length. Just as sleeves that draw a horizontal line across the widest part of the arm add width, so does a skirt which ends at the thickest part of the calf. Hard to tell from this photo where it's going to end up.
I have to tell you that I don't believe I have ever loved, or will ever love a jacket quite as much. It is my constant companion from September to whenever summer settles and I look fabuolous in it. Sometimes rules are there to be disregarded with reckless abandon. Shopping is an art, not a science.
Oh, and don't go and look for the dress on ebay and bid for it - because then there'll be no Part two, and we'll Never Know.